Title: The Austere Academy.
Series: A Series of Unfortunate Events #5.
Writer(s): Lemony Snicket.
Illustrator(s): Brett Helquist.
Publisher: HarperCollins Publishers.
Format: Hardcover.
Release Date: August 8th, 2000.
Pages: 201.
Genre(s): Fiction, Fantasy, Young Adult.
ISBN13: 9780064408639.
My Overall Rating:
Previously in A Series of Unfortunate Events series:
The Bad Beginning (Book #1).
The Reptile Room (Book #2).
The Wide Window (Book #3).
The Miserable Mill (Book #4).

You’d think that school would be a safe place for children, that it would promote their growth, their happiness, and their self-realization. You’d think that teachers, principals, and deans would look out for these children as if they were their own, that they would always protect them from all sorts of danger, even those that grow within us. You’d think that children would learn everything they need to do better than the previous generation within these educational environments rich in knowledge and experience. Unfortunately, Violet, Klaus, and Sunny, once more, can’t catch a break and find themselves at the mercy of wicked adults and a rude, violent, and filthy girl in this latest misadventure in their lives. The fifth novel in the A Series of Unfortunate Events is another chapter into the tales of survival of the Baudelaire orphans as the always-in-disguise Count Olaf continues to haunt them as long as they live and breathe.
What is The Austere Academy about? Welcome to Prufrock Preparatory School, the latest destination for the Baudelaire children after their last miserable experience at the Lucky Smells Lumbermill left them without care again. Dropped off at the boarding school by Mr. Poe to be under the supervision of Vice Principal Nero, Violet, Klaus, and Sunny are condemned into rotting away in a crab-infested and fungus-full shack, forbidden to profit from all the school’s benefits (except two particularly boring classes) without a living guardian to sign a permission slip. Unfortunately for them, despite being in an environment supposedly beneficial for learning and discovery, they find themselves suffering through the strict rules of this academy, not only from the Vice Principal but also the new gym teacher Coach Genghis. What follows is another series of unfortunate events as the relentless Count Olaf strikes again.
“Assumptions are dangerous things to make, and like all dangerous things to make—bombs, for instance, or strawberry shortcake—if you make even the tiniest mistake you can find yourself in terrible trouble.”
— Lemony Snicket.
Unlike the previous book, this one doesn’t feature any deadly sword fights or a bloody death that could traumatize even the most cold-blooded of psychopaths, that is, if you exclude the tragic fate of the old gym teacher who then gets replaced by a new one who we all know who he really is pretending not to be. Once more, the adults in this story are incompetent in more ways than one, not showing a semblance of understanding or wit to notice what’s unfolding right under their noses. Vice Principal Nero, in particular, is incredibly condescending and narcissistic and mimics whatever the children say with an obnoxious tone. Thankfully, the Baudelaire orphans have learned so much from their past experiences and know how to play the game when it comes to talking to adults. Although they mature faster than any other children of their age, their family name makes it so that they can’t have a moment of respite, even when they do their best to turn lemons into lemonade.
This isn’t a tragic story without a single happy moment though. Author Lemony Snicket once more plays with our feelings by introducing new children, the Quagmire triplets, although they’re just two with one having died in a fire, who resemble the Baudelaire in so many ways. To see how compassionate, understanding, and friendly these two were with Violet, Klaus, and Sunny is just wonderful to read about, especially after everything they’ve already gone through. However, like anyone who should know by now how author Lemony Snicket writes his stories, nothing good ever lasts longer than necessary. While everything is quite predictable in this tale, it’s written and executed quite wonderfully, quite addictively—with the usual cynical humour, numerous definitions of complicated words integrated into the story, and some fourth-wall breaking—making you want to continuously root for the orphans and pray that they get a happy ending. Unfortunately, it is not in this one that they get anything that looks like a happy ending.
The Austere Academy is another twistedly-inviting installment in the sad and unfortunate events that compounds into the life of the Baudelaire children, this time in a hellish boarding school.



I must say I never read any of the books, but I did enjoy the Netflix series quite a lot! The unrelenting tragedy leavened by black humor and sardonic wit definitely put The Series of Unfortunate Events in its very own category when it comes to children’s literature 🙂
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I had checked out the first season but never got around to finishing the Netflix series. I might go back to it when I’m done revisiting the books though! Thanks for reading, Ola. 🙂
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I haven’t read this series but if my kid develops interest in books I will buy them in future. Excellent review, Lashaan!
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It’s such a fun series, dark and cynical at times, but fun and whimsical too other times! Thanks for reading, Yesha. 🙂
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Ahhh, the Quagmire Triplets. I’m pretty sure they show up at least once more in the series. I enjoyed their inclusion, as they were about the only hopeful note that the Baudelaires ever came across…
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They were such wonderful little friends to them. It sucks that the Baudelaires couldn’t at least have them by their side longer. At least for now.
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sadly, their story is just as sad, if not sadder, than the Baudelaires. And I don’t think they get nearly as happy an ending as the Baudelaires…
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I enjoyed the movie. I had not know they were still making more books in the series.
I love this series.
-James
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Actually, the author made 13 books in the series and completed it a long time ago now. I’m revisiting these now having read them as a kid and not remembering much of the details of the stories.
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Hi Lashaan,
I had been meaning to revisit the series years ago … you are right. The series was completed a long time ago now.
I await your post on the series in the future. Perhaps, it would jog my memory as well.
There are so many books on the shelves that I want to read that I have not gotten around to …
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Always great to see a series that’s fun to return to, even if about such unfortunate events.
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Absolutely, Todd. Lots of fun just tagging along seeing how much worse these unfortunate events could get.
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No happy ending? Damn that would be hard for me to read, especially as they are orphans!
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Yep, quite unfair for these poor kids! 🙂
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This is such a blast from the past. I remember loving these books growing up
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Same here, which is why I’m revisiting these slowly but surely! 🙂
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I’ve never read these books or watched any adaptations. Sounds like it might be worth giving a try. No happy ending? Ah well…
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They’re wonderful for what they are and nostalgia plays a huge factor in my own revisit of these books! 😀
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A Series of Unfortunate Events was my absolute favorite series as a child and I devoured each new book, sharing them with my cousins after I had read them to discuss. I think I always hoped that Lemony Snicket was toying with us, that there would be a form of a happy ending at the end of it all, but that was an obvious delusion of mine.
Still, I think the reason these books work so well for children is because they show just how incompetent adults can be (most of us are faking it anyway, right?) and that not everything is always happy go lucky. Kids can take a dose of reality, meaning not everything is fair and will work out in their favor. I guess I just appreciated that as a kid myself.
Also, I felt wicked smart reading these books and learning things alongside the Baudelaires.
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I still vividly remember reading them back in elementary too, but in French. I enjoyed the series a lot but I don’t remember much of the later books which is why I’m slowly working my way through these books again, enjoying the journey quite a lot in fact. I do understand what you mean there, I probably also loved the idea that these kids could outsmart adults anytime in their world. It made you realize that adults aren’t always the ultimate know-it-all reference in life. 😛
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I hear you! I also remember the earlier books more clearly than the later ones, but I attribute that at least in part to the movie with Jim Carrey as Count Olaf. I loved the books more than that movie, but I really liked the movie as well. I even had a playstation game based on it.
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I’m not sure why, but your description of the academy made me think of the one in the Mysterious Benedict Society – have you read those books? I found them really fun! (The first few I read, anyway)
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I’ve heard of those books but I’ve actually never tried any of them. I am intrigued and will give the first one a shot if I ever get my hands on it though. 😀
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I hope you enjoy them if you manage to get a copy!
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I know both older grandchildren derived enormous enjoyment from this series – although I found the first two very uncomfortable, given the way the children are horribly let down by the adults in their lives… Glad you’re finding the reread so much fun, Lashaan:)).
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I totally understand, Sarah! These children go through so much and it’s quite sad to see most adults in it work against their safety and happiness! Thanks for reading! 😀
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Even without sword fights and bloody deaths. School can already be traumatizing.
This is another series I need to re-read.
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I’m having a great time rereading this and I hope you do too whenever you decide to do so! 🙂
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